i'm happy...

when i woke up this morning, i could feel the goodness comin' on.

not just because it was Mother's Day, but because both my guys were around for morning snuggles (as apposed to Justin being off at work or on a run most other mornings).

Asa's babbling has gone to a whole new level lately... i swear the kid knows what he's talking about... i just wish i did.  it's so stinkin' cute!  as soon as he's done with his morning bottle, the conversation starts... and doesn't end 'til sundown.  now, i can hardly imagine my morning starting without it.

once we were up and running, the rest of the day included : 

a delicious breakfast prepared by my wonderful honey

10 o'clock service with our Branch family

home for some backyard fun and relaxation before little man's nap

settin' up shop for our maternity/family photoshoot

then we were off for a quick visit to my parent's for a Mother's Day afternoon meal (crab cakes, lamb chops, and orzo... yum.)

just an hour and 1/2 later, it was back home to welcome our dear friends and amazing photographers, Dustin and Diana.  

the evening was filled with photo takin', good laughs, great conversation, and thin crust pizza.  nothin' but the best!  if you get a chance, give these guys a looksie... Bella Loren Photography... you'll be very happy you did!  

be on the lookout for some photos from our shoot today in the next couple weeks!

so there you have it folks... my second mother's day as a mama myself, and gosh! it was a good one!

next year the sugar will be twice as sweet... can't wait!

hope tomorrow morning finds you all on the right side of the bed... mondays don't have to be so bad ;)

my heart for Mother's Day...

sweet smooches for mama

these are the words of a precious note my husband left for me one Mother's Day morning a few years ago.  it's still stuck on our bathroom mirror.

"Happy Momma's Day, Honey!

I know this is hard for you and since i woke up this morning, I've been praying for you.

I love you so much.  The Lord is for us. He loves us and one day soon we will be blessed with a whole lot of kids.  i just need you to know i love you."

tears are flowing even as i type.

my heart this, and every, Mother's Day is not only for the beautiful children i have, but for the ones i've lost.  you become a mother the minute you know there's a tiny miracle growing inside you.  there are so many women who have to face the heartbreaking realities of miscarriage and infertility, or have just been waiting years to get pregnant.

i knew when i was very young that i was gonna be a mama and i couldn't wait!

about 4 1/2 years ago, my honey and i found out we were pregnant for the first time.  the excitement was short-lived, as i lost it at around 7 weeks.

after that, we decided to wait.

a year 1/2 later, i was 'ready' to try again and we got pregnant for a second time very quickly.

each appointment showed a strong heartbeat and mama was feeling pretty good too.

when we went at 19 weeks to find out the sex of the baby, she still had a strong heartbeat, but they discovered a birth defect know as Turner's Syndrome.  she had a pretty severe case of it and they decided it would be best for us to see a specialist. when we went to see the specialist almost a week later, her heart had stopped beating.  we named her Sally, after my grandmother.

to most, i seemed so strong, but inside i was breaking.

still, i couldn't be angry with my Savior.

the doctor suggested i wait through three regular cycles to start trying again. we waited through two.

i was pregnant a third time.

i lost it around 7 weeks.

now is when the real questioning started to begin.

why did it seem like i was the only one?

why are there alcoholic junkies that didn't even want to be pregnant in the first place delivering healthy babies?

why don't i have any trouble getting pregnant, but i can't keep them?

still, i couldn't question the Father's love for me.

we didn't waste any time after that miscarriage... i didn't even have another cycle before i was pregnant again.... this time with my dear sweet Asa.

his name means physician or healer, and the Lord's given me so much healing through that boy, it's fantastic!

now, i'm more than 30 weeks into another healthy pregnancy with a beautiful baby girl.

every once in a while, my joy is interrupted by pain when i think on those heavenly babies that i never got to hold, but GOD IS GOOD and His love is bigger!

He gave me this testimony so that i might be an encouragement to others who are going through or have gone through similar circumstances.  i'm so thankful for this.

it's so amazing to know that His work is never finished!

i knew i would be a mother, and so i am.

i try to be so careful to love and appreciate every tiny morsel of this roll God's given me.

one last thing, a wonderful woman of God and dear friend suggested this book to me after our second loss.

find it here

while a lot of it speaks on her prayer quest for a painless childbirth (amazing!), she also suffered loss and provides some beautiful words of encouragement and references in scripture that got her through the initial pain and the fear that comes with every pregnancy afterwards.  i still read from it almost every night.

i truly can't wait to love on my boys and soak up every last second of this Mother's Day.  but, all the same, my heart is heavy for those who's hearts might be aching.  please be encouraged by this and know the Father's deep love for you... it covers EVERYTHING.

feeling preggers...

I'm skipping out on my usual Wishful Wednesday post to clue you in...

I'M DEFINITELY PREGNANT!

with both of my healthy pregnancies, i've counted myself very lucky because i didn't experience half the negative symptoms that a lot of women do (i.e. morning sickness and vomiting, major fatigue, boobs growing to giant sizes overnight, stretch marks, etc.)

mine have been on the more mild side -- i always get a cold right around the time i find out i'm expecting, i've had food aversions, a small bout with headaches, heartburn, and gum sensitivity.

with Asa, i felt great (for the most part) 'til the day i delivered!  never really felt 'pregnant'.

but, right now, at 30 1/2 weeks with this sweet baby girl, i'm SO feelin' it!

it probably has something to do with toting my boy around a lot of the time, but might also be for a few of these reasons :

1} Bellamy has decided to use my bladder as a trampoline.  this makes coughing, sneezing, laughing, and pretty much any other activity impossible without me having the urge to pee in my pants on a regular basis.

2} the dreaming has seriously gotten out of hand!  call it hormones, but they are WEIRD and keep me up half the night.

3} comfort in general is hard to come by at all lately... esp when it comes to nighttime sleep.

4} heartburn up to my throat.

5} also, i had a few (normal) bodily complications toward the end of my pregnancy with Asa that started effecting me already weeks ago with this one... causing pain.  

now that i've exhausted every complaint in the book, let me just say... feeling pregnant is a good thing.  all that really matters is that there's this healthy, growing, miracle of a baby girl inside me and i get to meet her in just a few short weeks!  so thankful!

now, i'm calling the doc to see if there's anything mild i might be permitted to take that could help me sleep a little better.  

teamwork...

husband and wife are the ultimate duo to begin with, but

the ante is upped when kids are thrown in the mix!

i just love it when my hubby and i can work together in perfect harmony to take care of our boy.  this happens most when Asa's bedtime rolls around.

it normally looks something like this...

Justin takes him upstairs for a bath while i get the bottle ready and then head on up to bring in a diaper and jammies.  once he's squeaky clean, we're off to his bedroom... i rock him with his bottle while Justin reads from the bible.  we pray together and each give him a squeeze before daddy leaves. i give him an extra squeeze, lay him down, sing to him and say "nigh nigh" while he waves bye-bye to me.

we'll probably be weaning him off of the bottle pretty soon, which kills me. 

but for now, bedtime's just perfect.

it's such a sweet time to share with our boy each night and i feel so blessed that our family is what it is.

there's gonna have to be a whole lot more teamwork where this came from when baby Belle gets here..... eeek!  i'm nervous, but OH SO excited to meet her!

BONUS!

here's a sweet clip of some lil' monkey chatters... just have to share!

scratch that. bummer... i can't figure out how to upload it on here :/

pictures from Wendy...

in lieu of the fact that my last post was miles(!) long... 

here's one that's short but very sweet.

Wendy and Daniel sent us at pics of our boy every day that we were gone, 

and here's a few of my favorites.

bathtime... oh, i wanna squeeze 'im!

@ Sam Ash playin' the chimes

empty blueberry container                              

just awake... sleepy eyes... love

mexican lunch with 'uncle' Dan

A Bite of the Big Apple...

whew! this week was quite the whirlwind, so i'm JUST getting around to my New York post.

there's just so much to tell :)

to prep, i made sure i covered ALL the bases and then some as far as leaving our boy was concerned.  i might have been a little too thorough... leaving post-its all over the house with little reminders, picking out each days outfits and pajamas, and calling a ridiculous number of times each day we were gone.  but, Justin says he's proud... that i did pretty good for my first time leaving him.  i knew he was in some of the best hands with our dear friends Wendy and Daniel!  they needed the practice, considering they'll probably be having kids of their own VERY soon (hint hint, Wendy).

Thursday

we were out the door soon after Ace awoke... our flight took off at 9:55 am.

by noon, we were in a taxi heading to our hotel, Ink 48.

our room number just so happened to be our zip code, 704.  hmm, this little getaway was definitely meant to be ;)

            

we headed out to scarf down some lunch at the infamous Carnegie Deli, pit-stopped at St. Patrick's Cathedral, and then 

hit some of the mainstream shops (i.e. H&M and Zara) to get some cute duds for the kiddies... how fun is it to shop for  your kids?!  more fun than shopping for myself, i think.

oh, and CELEBRITY SIGHTING!... in the midst of all this we passed the Wendy Williams Show and happened to catch a glimpse of Audrina Patridge heading in with her entourage!  i just stared and blindly fiddled with the buttons on my iPhone... no picture :(

open-faced corned beef reuben and a slice of cheesecake with fresh strawberries. uh, YUM!

after walking out the rest of our day, we ended up in Union Square for a late dinner at Steak Frites... some of the BEST burgers and creamed spinach we've ever had (weird combo, i know).

our room had a sweet surprise waiting for us when we got back!

Friday

started things off with breakfast in bed.  such a good thing.

we took our time getting ready and soaked up the morning.

by noon, we were off to Little Italy to meet my beautiful friend, Katy at one of our fave pizza joints, Sal's... at the intersection of Broome & Mott near Soho.

this place is t-tiny and this time there was a line out the door, so by the time we were chewing our last bites, they were practically kicking us out.  this is the case in lots of the city's smaller and more popular restaurants.  it's worth it.

we stopped at a couple vintage boutiques on Broome, making our way to Broadway.

i don't enjoy Soho as much as i used to on my first couple trips to NY.

anymore, you can't even move, there's SO many people.  

Topshop and All Saints were on our list of stops, but then we were gone.

heading to the East Village for more vintage fun.

we had an 8:45 reservation for Peter Luger's that evening... that i made in February.

this restaurant is legendary because they get FIRST pick of the meat at the markets, over ALL the other steakhouses in the city.  Brooklyn's Finest!  

we got all gussied up and savored every minute of it... our server thought Justin was Patrick Dempsey.  we totally should have played that game, but being the goofs we are, would probably have ruined it within the first couple minutes.

once again, the meal did not disappoint and we walked away two hours later full and happy as ever!

Saturday

Justin brought Starbucks coffee and munchies back to the room for breakfast and then we set out to do some damage at a giant Chelsea flea market (this was one of my favorite parts of the trip)... i'll be sure to share pics of some of our fabulous finds in a later post.

we took a short break in the middle for a delicious lunch at a quaint little deli across the street.

afterwards we headed to Central Park for some chillaxation before meeting Katy and Lee at the Met.

after exploring a few of their fantastic exhibitions (you can't begin to touch The Met in just one visit), we sat down to an Italian dinner at Patsy's Pizzeria on 60th... but not before putting our names in for the 2 hour wait at Serendipity 3.

another night, full to the brim and oh so happy!

Sunday

yummy pastries from nearby bakery for breakfast.

headed to Irving Plaza (near Union Square) for the Easter service at the Hillsong Church in NYC... so good!

the house was packed, which left us standing in the very back.  but, not all hope was lost... i'm guessing because i'm pregnant, a girl approached us and took my hand leading us up to the second row where two of the volunteers had given up there seats for us!  God's love was abounding in that place... so amazing... we soaked up His presence through the worship and the wonderful message delivered by Christine Caine.

Christine heads up the A21 campaign to stop human trafficking all across the world... read about it here.

after church, we made our way into Union Square to pick up some art and knick knacks from a few of the street vendors and grab our last meal at the Heartland Brewery before heading home.

sad to say goodbye...

but CAN'T wait to see our precious boy!

just a shot on 47th street heading back to the hotel for the last time.

considering we're adding another baby to the bunch very soon and alone time will be even more scarce than it already is, this trip was such a good thing for us.

we held hands the whole time, stayed up late, slept in, took baths, munched on deliciousness for every meal, and walked it all off!

thanks to my sweet honey for making this anniversary/babymoon weekend getaway happen and encouraging me through my Asa withdrawals.

i've got a prince of my own...

thought i'd join in on the trend, so...

in honor of the royal wedding, here's a couple shots from our day

May 21, 2005... best decision i've ever made!

6 years and (almost) 2 beautiful babies later and i couldn't love this man more.

we've grown so much, with a whole lot of it left to do.

and marriage ain't easy, folks, but what a fantastic blessing to walk this road with

my very best friend (who just happens to be one major hunk of a man)!

i'm lovin' that everyone's in the spirit to reminisce about their own wedding days...

Happy Royal Wedding Day!

Wishful Wednesday...

the free moments i've had sprinkled throughout this day have been Etsy moments.

here are just a few of my baby Bellamy wishes...

this precious 8x10 print would go just perfectly in her nursery

Alice in Wonderland ~ The White Rabbit bookend pillows

oh, there are no words.

tell me this isn't the sweetest thing since tootsie rolls!

love these monogrammed bloomers

a sweet traditional little crocheted bonnet is a must 

booties handmade in the prettiest vintage fabric

and, of course, mary jane crocheted booties

this boppy cover just happens to be cuter than ALL the ones at Babies R Us,

but i don't absolutely HAVE to have it.

i'm pretty sure EVERYONE knows about Etsy by now... the site for all things beautiful, handmade, and vintage alike.  if this is news to you, go check it out NOW!